Saturday, August 07, 2010

New Path.

So simple, yet so complicated.

It’s simple to say I am done for an indefinite amount of time off of racing and even training. NADA. U.C. (ulcerative colitis), which you don’t see, is that this disease is taking a toll. Nobody can see the disability so it can be hard to believe I have it, but quality of life has diminished.

Amazing that one can be stopped in their tracks so quickly, training and living life to the fullest. One of the reasons I did turn pro was because I had been so healthy for multiple months. Exercise is the last thing my body will accept right now, so now I rest, and rest. I have accepted that training will increase appetite (which I am unable to eat) and adds stress onto my body (that needs to heal), along with adds to issues of dehydration. No fun :(

Two months of trying to get coverage of a pre-existing condition, and now dealing with finding new docs has been a ridiculous challenge. But thankfully, after a trip to the ER the docs finally found it urgent enough to see me quickly and we are on a solid path to getting out of another repeated flare up.

Since regular meds are no longer working it looks like (assuming I pass all the tests) I will be on a lifelong treatment of Remicade or get the colon removed (which honestly, I would not mind at this point). There is a super high success rate with the i.v. treatment , so finger crossed I pass the test to qualify for them. However, there is no end in sight for when and if training and racing will ever begin.
This liquid diet of Ensure is not as bad as I thought it would be (I have tried all flavors now) , but ironically the weight loss is out of control. I always love being fit and healthy and being super thin and not healthy is not the ideal lifestyle. I feel weak. So whoever wrote “ Being Thin Never Tasted So Good” or something to that extent….I don’t agree. “Being Fit Never Tasted So Good” would be my book!

I am accepting this as a path I was meant to take, a journey to make me appreciate health, training, racing, and more than anything living.
There is a big picture to this that I am anxiously awaiting.

18 comments:

Laura said...

having a mom who has been through similar GI issues, I know you have to be in a pretty bad place to say that having your colon removed would be ok. I hate you hear the pain and suffering you are going through. You are a strong, strong lady but that doesn't mean this doesn't suck. You're right though, this path must lead somewhere good in the end. Lots of prayers and hugs....

Christi said...

I am so sorry to hear that you are having a flare up. I wish I could do something to help make it better but unfortunately all I can offer is my prayers! So I will be sending them your way.

My sister-in-law suffers from this as well and I know it is not fun. I wish we could make this terrible disease disappear! Hopefully, in time it will happen. Until then I am here for ya!

Kathy said...

Have you looked into The Specific Carbohydrate Diet? It pretty much cured my Chrons.

beth said...

So sorry T...I hate that you have to go through this. Let me know whatever you need, I can make costco runs...anything.

SSB said...

Oh no, so sorry to hear this. Wishing you speedy return to health.

LaVonne said...

Oh T, I'm so sorry to read about this. I wish I could think of something helpful to say, but just know that I'm always cheering for you, regardless of if you're racing or resting. Take care.

LaVonne

GoBigGreen said...

I havent commented before but felt the desire to on this subject. My husband was able to maintain a fully active lifestyle after Rx for some GI issues. I wont bore you with the details here but know that there are options and no matter what you are told, the younger you are, the better you will heal. I applaud you for taking the time NOW to get healthy and to realize you have alot of options!
Hang in there, wishing you a speedy recovery.

Beth said...

Darn it. Sorry to hear you are going through this Teresa. I work with Crohn's/UC patients all the time and like you, many of the UC patients JUST WANT THEIR COLON OUT! Hope you can find a suitable solution soon and start feeling back to normal. Have they given you the option of TPN to maintain your weight? Thinking of you lots!!

Kiet said...

TN, I'm hoping the best for ya. You're too awesome not to be able to train and race. But yes, your health is more important than your fitness!

Laura Collins said...

Teresa - I'm a little bit in disbelief because you put on such a brave face. Didn't realize how much you were battling this damn thing. I am rooting for you, and from one obsessed (and chronically injured) triathlete to another, I suspect we'll see you back in one form or another. In the meantime, you are a top notch coach and will do great things with TN Multisports!

Charisa said...

I'm so sorry Teresa, how frustrating! And I agree, being fit is much better than being thin. Just being healthy is so nice, I hope you have that again very soon! Glad you are looking out for your health, #1 importanto!!

Sarah Mc said...

Teresa, I am so sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time and I know you will pull through happy and healthy. You are totally right - your health is the priority and I'm glad you're taking care of yourself.

Melissa said...

Oh man. I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. My BFF from college has crohn's and the flare ups were always so bad and debilitating...I hope you aren't experiencing the same thing but from my reading on what ulcerative colitis is, I think maybe you are :-(

I hope you pass the tests you have to take, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

Marit C-L said...

Oh TN - I had no idea....I am so sorry. Going from GREAT shape to suddenly being stopped in your tracks is NOT fair and NOT fun. You and me together, my friend - although for very different reasons. I'm thinking about you too -a

Much love from CA!

PS - can you send me your mailing address? My email is "mchrislaut "at" aol "dot" com". THANKS!!!

hallie said...

oh girl i'm so sorry. you've had the most amazing year and to get stopped in your tracks so abruptly stinks. stupid colon. while i'm guessing you don't feel like it right now, please know you're my super hero friend and i think you're crazy strong.

rest and no stress for the next little while. training and racing will be waiting for you.
xo

Shawn and Tracy said...

Hi T :-( So sorry things are so rough right now. My sister in law has the same and after years of health struggles and finally having to take 3 months off work due to her worst flare up ever she agreed to go through with the 2 surgeries spaced about 2 months apart. She has recovered fast and for the first time in a decade was riding her bike last week....My thoughts are with you and I know you will make it through the other side.
Hugs,
Tracy

Jill Costantino said...

I hope you are healthy soon. Something that so many of us take forgranted. Wishing you a speedy return to health. Hugs to you!
XoXoX
P.S. If you ever make it up this way we have some pretty amazing GI specialists here!

jennifer said...

Hi, just found your blog on recommendation from my coach (Liz Waterstraat). I've just been stopped in my tracks from UC (haven't had colonoscopy yet but doc is 90% sure) coincidentally while training for Honu. I've never been truly sick a day in my life so this is a huge struggle. So happy to see that you've moved past it and are back into racing. It's hard to find success stories online... mostly just forums full of folks who are really struggling.

I'd be so interested to hear how you beat it, especially if you tried the Specific Carb Diet (which doesn't appear to remotely have enough carbs for endurance sports!) or if it was primarily the remicade. Thanks!